Not easy, on the first date, to know what to say exactly, especially as a! We don't want to overdo it and go too far in our questions, but at the same time, it is more than essential to ask "The good ”questions.
Today, if you are a serious Christian, in the dating phase and you are preparing for your first date, you have come to the right place. If you are a Christian looking to test your suitor on the first date, you are also welcome.
Help me ! What is a serious suitor?
A serious suitor is first of all a man who fears God. His attention, his ambitions, his heart, are entirely God's. Moreover, the Bible states in Matthew 6:33 (KJV) “Seek first the kingdom and God's justice and all these things will be given to you above.«
His objective is above all to seek what God wants, the interests of the Kingdom of God and he knows that God will bring him to the right person. From this point, will flow the fact that he does not try to force things, he is a calm man, he is not abrupt.
A serious suitor is also a stable man. He realized himself as a person, both on the outside (and here I am not talking about the physical…), and on the inside. He worked on himself with the help of Holy Spirit and espouses the values of the Word of God, in different areas of his life.
The conclusion is that a serious suitor is a relatively accomplished man whose spiritual post is affirmed. That doesn't mean he's perfect, he has flaws like everyone else, but he's working on it with the help of the Holy Spirit. He does not let himself be overcome by his bad emotions, his bad inclinations or any other source of negativity.
Now, if you are a man, you recognized yourself in the description given above: Great!
If you are a woman, you keep in mind these indications for your first Reserve. So far, so good? I hope!
As a serious suitor you should particularly focus on three things in a woman: her spiritual posture, her character / attitude and her outlook on life / ambitions.
His spiritual posture
If we go back to the first part, it's quite simply the reciprocal. A serious man is a God-fearing man, a serious woman is exactly the same. Often many men are blinded by a woman's physique and do not even present fundamental questions about her spiritual life.
Proverbs 31:30 (KJV) “Grace is deceptive, and beauty is vain; the woman who fears the Lord is the one who will be praised. »
We understand thanks to the Word, that it is appropriate to ask questions about the spiritual life, the spiritual evolution, the ministry, the services that she performs in the church or even her personal testimony. If she is not reserved, she will reveal her story to you fairly quickly and you will be able to know where she is, what type of person she is, etc. In any case, this type of question can only lead you to know your future spouse, in a more in-depth way.
His character / attitude.
Moreover, knowing the attitude and character of the person is mandatory. We cannot move forward with a person whose true nature we do not know.
We can bounce back from the previous questions, such as: "Why did you start to follow Jesus", by analyzing his answer to the question, we can be fixed on a spiritual posture. We will find out if she is rather discreet, reserved, shy or on the contrary, spontaneous, open and extroverted.
We can also ask him questions about his personality directly, or even indirectly during a conversation such as: “Ah! You rather like to be right, you! ", if she answers us by justifying herself, we will then understand that she will often want to be right in future discussions.
It may seem too simplistic, but nevertheless, these are questions and remarks, to be made during a first date, to really understand the person, at least, if you are a serious suitor.
In addition, to ask questions about his character, we want to really detect his attitude through his way of speaking, and we will have direct access to his heart: is it good or bad? Matthew 12:34 (KJV): “For out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. »
His vision of life / his ambitions.
Finally, arriving at the last part, quite delicate in a first date, and yet, this is what will make the difference between a serious suitor and a not serious suitor.
If you are a serious man, you will want to project yourself into the future already, even though it is only the first date. You would also like a person who also projects.
So, it is very important to ask questions about the person's outlook on life, about his values, what he is attached to. Is it the family? His work? His friends?
For example, if family is important to her, she would be more likely to want children, and maybe soon enough, these will be avenues to explore.
Do not be afraid to start, it's never too early to know the opinion of your future beloved on this subject, and then, everything is modifiable later. A couple is built!
We will also have to ask questions about her ambitions: where does she see herself in 5 years, 10 years? Why did you choose this or that career? Does she want to grow in her job? Does she wish to undertake other projects in parallel with her professional activities? Does she see herself in ministry?
These are all things to know because all of this will have an impact on the respected agendas of one and the other. And afterwards, if you are dating, or even if you are getting married, you will find the time to see each other regularly, to better build this relationship.
Now that we have taken the tour: Gentlemen, let us prepare our questions well in order to detect the personality, the ambitions, and mainly the attachment to God, of the person who will be in front of us.
As for you Mesdemoiselles, make a checklist during the Reserve and check if Monsieur ticks the cases with his questions, making sure that he dwells on those around God. If, on the contrary, his questions are vain or mundane, then you will know what to expect…
Author Sion Lubun