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Control your girlfriend's sexual urges. Also learn to say, “No”!

How strong and noble is the young boy who knows his share of responsibility in controlling his girlfriend's sexual urges!...
HomeGeneral AnnexesSexuality and the Christian LifeMy fiancé struggles with a hidden sin. What to do ?

My fiancé struggles with a hidden sin. What to do ?

I discovered that my fiancé is struggling with a hidden sin. What to do ?

Faced with certain situations, I like to develop the reflex of asking myself « what would the Lord Jesus have done in my place? » By asking myself these kinds of questions, I erase myself and I allow the One who lives in me by His Spirit, to be able to express himself. And it's always so much better!

And so faced with this question, I remember this story that the Bible tells us, about a woman caught in adultery (John 8:1-11) and which fits perfectly with our topic of the day. Let's see this together.

Get down and write on the ground: John 8:6b.

You don't need to expose family affairs in the public square. As Christians, we have an obligation to preserve the image of Christ vis-à-vis the world in general, and our immediate surroundings in particular.

I address myself here to betrothed in the Lord, on whom all darkness and all humanity have their eyes fixed. We have an obligation to be careful not to tarnish the image of Christ. Certainly, but you must not expose your brother/sister in the Lord either.

Faced with this sin, you must react like Shem and Japheth by covering the nudity of a son/daughter of the Father. Do not let this weakness cause you to lose sight of the status of the one with whom you will bond for life. Do not allow this situation to serve as a stumbling block to an unbeliever. Watch over your tongue, keep it wise not to say what you shouldn't, to whom you shouldn't.

React exactly like the Master, in front of the accusers, hold your tongue, and take care of the essential. May the Lord help us in the name of Jesus!

Do not cast stones: John 8:7.

Don't do that at all. You're not perfect either. If God exposed your heart, your life, your thoughts, I'm not sure your record would be clean. We are all covered by the blood of Christ, keep that in mind.

It is deplorable to see how Christians these days are ready to shoot point-blank at each other, as if they themselves had nothing to reproach themselves for. God is gracious to whom He wills, and if you think you are standing today, be careful not to fall, because the enemy is still lurking.

The age of law is over brother/sister, we live in the age of grace. And if you can enjoy it, why would you want your fiancé to be deprived of it? Please allow him to enjoy it too, it is a right that Christ on the Cross acquired for him. Mercy triumphs over judgment, the love of Christ has triumphed for you, let it triumph for him/her too.

Letter of James 4:11 (PDV2017) “Christian brothers and sisters, do not speak ill of one another! Whoever speaks ill of a brother or sister, or who judges them, speaks ill of the law and judges the law. And if you judge the law, you no longer obey the law, you are its judge. »

Give thanks to God.

Ephesians 5:20 (NFC) “Give thanks to God the Father at all times and for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ. »

It is a grace that God gives you, by allowing you to discover this sin in the engagement rather than in marriage. Besides, that's precisely what the engagement period is for: self-observation. God opened your eyes to this sin to prevent you from believing in a lie or an illusion.

It is often said that love makes you blind, but to you, God has granted the grace to have your eyes wide open so that you know with whom you are committing yourself. And for that, it's important that you say thank you.

Urban artist "Whatever is unmasked by light appears clearly, for whatever appears thus is light" tell us Ephesians 5:13 (S21). Deuteronomy 29:28 (NFC) adds: “What is hidden only the Lord our God knows. But we know what has been revealed to us forever, to us and to our descendants, that is, to put into practice the words of this teaching. »

By exposing this hitherto hidden and unknown sin, God is showing you that he is justly willing to help put an end to it. He has struggled for a long time with his own strength and resources, and now God is exposing him even as you enter the engagement. God uses the light in you to condemn the works of darkness in the life of your fiancé(e), you must see it as a privilege and give him thanks.

Help your fiancé out of there.

Identify the type of sin, and the appropriate solution. Is it a sin related to sex, money, lying, bad company? You can already start by reporting it to your mentor or faith leader. The question of marriage is so important that I hope you don't make the mistake of going there on your own. I pray that there are around you, mature, mature, wise and submissive people to the Holy Spirit, to accompany you in this momentous season of destiny.

Talking to a mentor will keep you humbled by remembering that you always need elders. Talking to a framer shows that you are willing to find a solution and not let the devil win over you.

You have to pray about that too. The fervent prayer of the righteous has great effect (James 5:16). Don't overlook the power of prayerful agreement as you begin the process toward marriage. Involving God in your affairs makes you an unbreakable three-ply cord. Ecclesiastes 4:12 (KJV) “And if any man is stronger than one, both can resist him; and the three-ply rope is not easily broken. »

Deal with this before marriage.

I end by inviting you to be wise. Marriage is not just for one day, but for life. Are you going to risk letting this sin hinder or tie up your salvation? Are you ready to tolerate, turn a blind eye to this sin indefinitely? If the Lord returns and you find it like this, are you sure He will take you away?

If your answer to these questions is no, then try to deal with this sin before saying yes to it for life. What you could not tolerate tomorrow or in the presence of your children, you cannot tolerate today either. Anything that would jeopardize your communion with the Holy Spirit, put an end to it without procrastinating.

If that doesn't change already today, trust me marriage will only be the amplifier. Absolutely do not take the risk of believing that he (she) will change over time. Proverbs 28:13 (NFC) « Nothing succeeds with him who hides his faults, but he who admits it and renounces it is forgiven. »

Marriage is good, it's beautiful, it's wonderful, it's all you can imagine… But Heaven is even more so. Never lose sight of Heaven. Thus, you will not allow yourself the luxury of dirtying your dresses with any stain whatsoever.

May the Lord help us!

Proverbs 27:17 (NFC) “Iron sharpens iron, contact with others sharpens the human spirit. »

Hebrews 10:24 (KJV) “Let us watch over one another, to stir us up to charity and good works. »

Author Arlette MASSAGA

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